EMAILS FROM THE WAR ON TERROR

This is officially a blog. All emails are sent to me then I post them here. I have taken his name out to protect his identity. But most of you know who it is.

*Disclaimer* Some of the emails are graphic. Obviously these emails are about war, so if you don't wanna read them leave now. The emails at the top of the page are the newest ones, ones at the bottom are the oldest, I'll try and date them. I haven't edited them for spelling or grammar but I have double spaced them to make them easier to read. Wanna write Mr. Army man? Send emails to e@bloodsaint.com and I'll make sure he gets them. I took down his picture and edited him name just in case the Army tries to mess with him for sending these.

(die ompalumpas) 11-03-05

Well, yesterday was a strage day. We rooled out on patrol and about a hour into it we get called to the neighboring sector because the POG MPssaid soething was afoot. Well, as soon as we roll up some asshole starts poping off AK rounds at us and my top gunner is trying his best to climb back into his bodyarmour yelling someone is shooting at us. Well, where the fuck is it cooming from, we cant see and they cant shoot so look asshole. Well, he says he sees someone running across the street but all I see are Iraqi police diving to the ground and taking cover. We turn our convoy around and finally see muzzle fire and return fire. After a quick volley from two 50s and two 240s no one shoots anymore. Well, the POGs pull their head out of their asses and remember they have a MK 19 automatic granade launcher and are just aching to shoot it but the IP has already stormed the building we recieved fire from. So we circle the block and realise they ran into this large factory we circled. Well, theres a gate stopping us. Not for long. Ever see what a 12000 pound HMMVW with a solid steel bumper on the front will do will do to a flishy gate. Man were there some pissed hodgy for that. So were inside this huge factory and, well, this is not the ideal situation because we have twenty guys and this place is huge. So we should pull out and wait for reinfoprcements. Hell no all six dismounts jump out and start cleaning the place. Turns out its a fucking chocolate factory. Didn't know that. Well, the MPs come in to help. or they say they're helping, really they are just cluttering the loading area. Luckily one of the radios craps out and needs to be brought back in to get fixed. Wonder how that could have happened? We fix our problem and head back out for the last hour of our patrol. Well, I'll be dammed if at almost and hour we have to head up to an auto accident which was recieving sniper fire. We get there and as soon as we get out of the trucks the rounds start coming in. Not hitting a damm thing. So we turn around and haul ass after the shots becuase we figured some dickhead decieded to pull a drive by or it came from a roof top like the other unit says over the radio. We follow the Bradlleys in as the roll right over the guard rails and into the neighborhood and hit the bulding we deciide the shots came from. Everyone but the dirvers and gunners go into the house and dont find shit. But we got guys on the roof to watch for drive bys so all is well and that Bradley in front of me is just aching to shot his guns off when all hell breaks loose. See, I'm parked by an on ram, not ideal but the best place I could find when someone lets off a qwuick burst from an AK. Could have been IP or IA, those assholes shot at any and everything and dont care if its us, them or insurgents. Well, after that short burst someone lets loose a quick return burst and then everyone starts shoooting at this van on the on ram. I'm driving and cant see shit but sitting in a metal truck under an overpass and a shitload of weapoms going off and I'm trying to crawl deeper inside my body armour. Oh, and that Bradley. Well, he goes apeshit trying to locate a target spinning hit turret around so fast i thought it was going to fly off and then decided to start back up to get onto the ramp. Well, I'm in his way and I doudt he's stopping for shit so I haul ass backwards without the benifit of anyone watching and ram into a wall, a tree, and a power pole but I aint stopping until I can cut back down a side street, the whole time my gunner yelling holy fuck. I make the trun right as the Bradly catches up and crashes back over the guard rail and I sit there for two hours. Now remember we were supposed to head back in before all this happened so the longer I sit there the mosre pissed I'm getting. Then our RTo cant get through to battalion to get clearence for something I had no idea for because I wasn't on the net but someone was shot up and that all I knew. Well, I found out on the way back we had just blown the shit out of two supposivly soft drink deliverymen. When I pulled up and saw the van there was hundred bullet holes in and all these two jokers had was a wound in the calf and the other had a bullet go through his neck and exit without hitting an artery or his spine. It utrns out they were delivering this shit to us but yet they had weapons on them so sooemthing is afoot. Intel can sort it out. But we did jack all the coke cases in the truck and grab they're AKs and 9mm. So in closing about my day, we had to go out for four hours latter last night but the only thing that happened was we got extended for thirty minutes because 2nd platoon stuck they're heads up theyre asses and could pull them out before they left the wire, we managed to shoot up a chocolate factoy and coke deliverymen. Not exactly childhood dreams but hey, they shot first and we cant choose the location. Well, gotta run.

(Trick or Treat) 11-01-05

Nobody does halloweeen like us. Were all about giving out tricks and treats. ANd eysterday was no exception. I'll go over a few. We were supposed to go out from ten to fourteen hundred then come back and relax and go back out from twenty hundred to twenty four hundred. Trick. We were out all fucking day. I'll go int that in a minute. I told the other guy in my truck that if he'd gun during day, I'd do it at night. Trick, my team leader wanted me driving because the other guy is a idiot so treat for me-------sort of. The Ac started to crap out so trick on me. When we came in to get fuel and recieve our warning order the chow hall was closed so some nice kind specialist decided to go to burger king and buy everyone chow. Treat for the patrol, trick my my stupid ass for having money on me. SO, anyways, we got to sleep in until eight yesterday and headed out at ten four what was supposed to be a six hour patrol when right before we left we got word some one we wanted was in house that we were going to hit that evening since ramadon was closing and they would be having a nice family meal. SO off we went and had no problems all patrol. We get back and they tell us, sorry, stay by the trucks wee heading out early. I grab chow for everyone and wait to get word to head out. Now, as far as we know this is just supposed to be a quick raid with just my patrol and a firts platoons patrol heading out. It wasn't that unussual that the CO and first sargent would come along. But we were told to head over to FOB Hawk across the raod to stage. When we pulled through the gate there were at least fifteen other trucks lined up. SO this was going to be a littel bigger then I thought. I had read the intel about who we wanted and I figured the more the merrier right. Well, then the battalion commader and saregent major showed up so that meant we wer geting our own apaches too. Hell yeah. ANd then four supped up HMMVVS pulled up and SF got out and I knew this was going to be something big. THose guys dont work with us unless they know they got something good and need muscle for security. In all there must have been twety five trucks heading out. SO we go over final preperations and am told I will have to set up my part of the cordon by myself, no problem, I look over the map, get it sorted out and hop in and off we go. WIth that much leadership you figure thing go smoothly but you dont know the army. It quickly became a rat fuck. ALl the sudden the special forces boys break off and we get lost. We quickly unfuck ourselves and reach the drop off point. My leader jumps out and I haul ass to my corner to cut off traffic and do my part to tighten the noose. I'm all set and to my knowledge everthing is going good. I monitor the radio and nothing bad is happening and no shots are fired. Excpet for the fact that I have the only radio that reaches all the other trucks and some old asshole keeps wanting to walk throught our cordon nothing is out of place. Then we get word to form up, were leaving and no one can find the trucks. Well, were on phase line black. Bullshit, were on phase line black and we cant see you. Did you try looking over. All three elements, stop moving. Roger that, 34 and 34b----my truck, are on the road past the phase line in bravo companies AO, all three element move to that location-------------whoops. Hey, I never saw the first turn and besides I was following the guy in front, it was his fault. SO we made the cordon a little bigger is all and everyone got a nice blackhawk down feeling of running throught the streets of baghdad all alone. Well, we get back and everything comes out. No one is mad at us, the maps sucked and we did what we wer supposed to do, just on a bigger scale. So, the house we were supposed to hit had a big iron gate in front, no problem, our HMMVWs have big stell bumper on front and when we couldn't open the gate the first truck just rammed through the fucker. Only after we trashed the gate did the platoon sargent realise it wa the house next door. Well, they flexed to that house and everyone surrendered peacefully. But the women started rasing hell. They started beating themselves and thowing up on themselves and all kinds of sick shit, which by the way is a good sign. If the women dont say anything and are peaceful they know they have nothing to fear. The men will be released in a few days and no harm no foul. If the start pulling there dresses over they're heads and screaming like a banshee they know they're men are the ones we want and are about to tax they're asses. Basically if they're calm then the guys are normal citizens and will be released. If they raise hell, then they know they are not going to be seeing them again because we know they're assholes. SO we bring our bag of goodies home. I dont know what happened in they're truck but when SF showed up at the gate they told us that they're guy had already confessed to being a very naughty boy and they were really going to tear into his ass. They found all kinds of good intel at they're spot and were going to have a field day with it. SO that what we were used for, a smoke screen. We went and raised hell over here while they went after the real target. Slight of hand you see. SO know we all get to share in the limelight that we cuaght a big fish and get to wear a Special FOrces combat patch since we went on a mission with them. Will I wear it? No, I'm not a tool. BUt we have a few guys that will. After that we went out for a hour for our presence patrol and I took over the gun. While I was up there someone opened up about a full mag of AK into the air and we spent the whole time trying to find them. To close out our patrol we picked up a sniper element who just emerged out on the street like ghouls in our night vision googles. We came home and that was my halloween. I would have rather spent it trick or treating for sure. Well, hope all is well with everyone back home. Gotta run.

(New Pet) 10-30-05

Hello all. Another day closer to getting out of this shithole. Well, tommorrow we go out for fun on the streets of Baghdad for halloween. Doudt we;ll get treats but plenty of treats and maybe a hell of a horror show. Seems only festive right. Well, lets see, what to go on a tangent about today. Well, go with POGs, they're always good for a fit of rage. So, me my roomate, 2nd squad's leader, my team leader and one of our walking wounded headed over to the POG chowhall for the good stuff today. So in a war zone with everybody carrying guns and in camo outfits you still need your ID to get into weat lunch. Hey, we dont want to be feeding the people were here to kill right. Well, these asshole POGs guarding the door stop and examine each ID to see if its real and yours. Dickheads. Then they inspect your weapon to insure its on safe. Well, we were just back from patol and not in the mood. This cheese dick staff sargent stops me, cards me and as I walk off grabs me by my weapon sling to check my weapon. I tun around and yell, What the fuck----------infantrymen stand out around here because were all tired looking and we cvarry M-4 riffles with all the goddies on them, tach lights, infared laser sights, close quarter cobat optics, scopes, and on the outside our weapons look like hell from being bumped around riding in trucks and crashing through doors. Anyways, this guy stops me to check to se if my weapon is on safe. I have a quick thought of holding up my trigger finger and telling him this is my safty but decided this was the all this dude had to show for a year in Iraq so I turned around to show him my weapon. Then the son of a bitch says I cant see it. Look asshole. So I hold it up and he flips out becaus my weapon barrle comes higher them my waste but was still pointed in a safe direction because I guess he was blind and hes yelling muzzle awareness and his buddies start creeping in closer and oh shit, were about to get into it in front of the chow hall when my team leader laughs and says, hey, you just killed the wall meach. Everyone stops and I walk off before I punch the dick in his face. I dont think I'm allowed back there anymore. Stop me dickhead. They have real taco there with real refried beans and fresh watermellon. There are a few things that your not allowed in a warzone but Joe still manages to obtain. Enemy weapons are one. Alcohol is another. Local daughters sold to us by they're fathers for footpowder-------dont ask. Another is pets. Now, this place is over run with dogs so it seems logical that they will find a way onto camp since we throw food away by the truck oad here. But bringing one into your hootch and playing with it is something that only a crazy person would do. Unless your Joe. Somehow my hootch has become home to this little black and white puppy mutt which spends all day and night howling for food and treats-------it really is a hodgy mutt. Well, the fucking thing probably has who knows what diseases and parasites and gods knows what else so lets have it inside where we sleep and play with it. Hell no. Me and my roommate are about to have at it over this. It already shit and pissed all over the other guys room so lets give it a chance to do its bussiness all over something I have to wear twelve hours a day in the sun. But as tired and pissed as I ussually am after mission I cant bring it on myself to beat the little bitch like the hispanics do in our platoon. On a side note, any of you marry a hispanic just be forwarded. THere is nothing that makes them feel better then beating a innocent defenceless creature. If that offends any of you fuck you. Every Puerto Rican, Mexican, Columbiian, El Salvadorian we have has whooped this dogs ass and us gringo are the ones threatening to kill them afterwards and none of us like the damm thing. Well, my roommate went down to the K-9 unit and got some dog shampoo from those jokers, have no idea how he got it but the little shit smells better. Well, today after the gyum I came back and found the little terror chewing on my sandles and my roommate fast asleep. I just turned around and went to my buddies room and told him about it then went back and turned over my roomates bed with in it. Before he could get pissed I pointed to the mutt and he just said sorry and went outside and built a damm kennel for it. I cant wait until the sargetn major sees it. Private Meacham reporting for duty!!!!!!!!!! Oh hell, having the little bitch running around actually makes this place feel a little like home. In a few weeks I'll probably look forward to coming back from mission and playing with the little terror. Until then I'll just keep calling it the little shit. Well, gotta run. Hope you got a good idea of what a day in the life of a JOE in hell is like. Horseshit on end. Take care and thinking of yall often.

Editors Note: The following email in red text was a email from Mr. Army man that was not about Iraq but about the website so I thought I would share this. Here it is in RED:

(New Update) 10-24-05

You need a haircut hippy. Nice legs in the pumps, I knew you'd come out one day. Is the girl on the page your main squeeze or just some random drunk at a party you had your picture with to tell the world shes your love slave. Well, the site looks awsome and everyone here loves it. Hope all is well. Take care and love ya.

Editor: Nice to see that he still has a good sense of humor!!

(Allah be Merciful) 10-26-05

Hello all, just a quick shout out to let you know all is well------sort of. A couple of days ago the other side of the platoon was out and hodgy decided to open up with RPGs the cocksucking bastards. Three of our guys got nicked, no one was killed and nothing serious, well getting wounded is serious but no one lost anything. Two of the guys got sent to Germany for shrapnal wounds and the other is hobling around here with a wound that wont close because there is still metal in the wound so it constantly opens up. I think after two days of that I would just tell the doc to cut out all the flesh around the wound and let it heal up. Setting off a metal detector for the rest of my life is not something I want to deal with. But another causualty was a toy we have I cant really talk about except it keeps bombs from going boom on us. Well, it got knocked out so between missions I had to get the fucking thing fixed. They really dont have anyone else to do this shit I guess. SO for the time being were going back to five hour patrols. Knocking off two hours from patrol makes all the difference in the world. Except with all the action that has been going on last night they decided to change it up on us while we were in sector. Not a good moral booster. So I;ll get to that. Our afternoon patrol went fine for the first hour until we were called back to regroup with second platoon. Seems the intel guys found the home of a sniper and they wanted us to pay a visit. So off we go to tell him hello and we got our game plan and when we get there it tunrs into a clusterfuck. See, theres this fellow that loves riding with us on missions. He univited but he comes along anyways. He always there and as much as you plan he has a all access pay to any mission you go on. His name is Murphy. Well, Mr. Murphy always has to throw in his two cents to every mission and this one was no exception. My job was to stop traffic coming into our cordon and keep people from getting in and out. Oh, and Murphy loves working with the locals. SO my team leader place our truck on a street faces trafic and in the middle of a neighborhood with everyone running to and fro. Locals love seeingif they can penitrate your perimeter. And the insurgents are watching american tv, specifically gangstr movies so they picked up drive bys. I have a major street in front of me, kids playing on houses of both sides of me and the assholes house behind me. Well, the kicker is that some dickhead had parked his dump truck in front of me and I couldn't see all the way down the road and worse, on coming trafic couldn't see me until it was too late. SO I have the whole world to watch in front of me and a constricted view of the road in front of me when old momma iraqi come walking up with a arm full of bags. Now, the old women around here are the worst. Ever see a stubborn mule, these old hags are ten times worse and pointing your weapon at them is nothing new to them. So we tell her to stop and jabbers off I have no idea what when I see a car pull around the dump truck. The truck is already in my danger zone as I call it or the area with which I shot directly at the driver. SO I have to use ecellerated escallation of vilolence---------love these terms we have. First your supposed to wave your arms, then yell, then point you weapon, then fire a warning shot, then fire into the vehicle. But since the car was only about twenty meters from me I had to put a few steps together. SO I yelled "Hey fucking stop!" while waving my left arm and pointing my weapon at him, he rolled about another foot and I fired a warning shot. See, its not supposed to happen this fast but as I said I had a small danger area to work with so I had to be that much more enthusiastic. He didn't stop but he was already to close to begin with when I first saw him. In hind sight he probably couldn't reacted as fast as I wanted but hey, I was scared, I knew there were VBIDs out and being blown up again didn't intrest me none so I fired directed into his window. Well, my shot and the guy outside watching my left ent into the window and the guy still didn't stop. SO I switched to the machine gun but then the guy rally inpressed me. It takes me all of about two seconds to put my M-4 down, reach over and charge my 240 machinegun and get it on target but in that time the guy had managed to stop his car, put it in reverse and head back out into traffic where I couldn't get a clear shot. Now, had I been Iraqi Army, I would have just blazed away and be dammed all the cars full of families driving by. Allah was watching over that dude I can tell you now. Or maybe it was luck. I spent last night going over that little event in my mind because what if the guy had been a normal citizen who just had his head up his ass. HAd he been riding a VBED or vehicle bourne exploding device as soon as he saw me aiming at him he would have spead up to get as close to me as possible to blow me up. I choose to think that he was some asshole at the wrong time and place who luck just smiled upon. Oh yeah, and the old lady. Aftr that little incedent she had no complaints about walking around our area. So after we trashed the snipers home, he was already in custudy thatnks to those guy from the unit that doesn't exist we loaded up and got word that another IED was found. This one was planted in some field outside the Baghdad vetranary collage. I had no idea this shithole had a collage let alone a vet school. I had no idea these people gave a shit enough about they're pets. They have no compunctions about leaving dead people on the streets. So we get there and it was the oddest place to set an IED. It was in a field twenty meters off the road in the back of the school where no one goes. SO we set up a perimeter and wait for EOD. It took forever. FOr some reason on this day everyone decided that this was going to be the day they wanted to drive down that road though. ANd everyone wanted to see what the hell we were doing so ton of people are just walking up wanting to know whats going on and could they have a look. No, get the fuck out of here. Well, we aited so long I had to piss but I remembered what happened last time I got out to piss so I just went in a water bottle. Well, I was covered from the gun shield but from waste down all you had to do was look in the front windshield and you could see what I was doing. WHile I was doing my bussiness some Iraqi lady just decided to walk by and look in. I have no idea what she said but the smile on her face told me two things. One, look at that stupid gringo pissing in a bottle when this who country pisses in our water supply, or two, it must be cold out here today. I choose to beleive the third, thats bigger then the men around here. Well EOD shows up and decideds to control blow the bomb. SO we wait for everyone to get into place and clear the air so no helicopter get hit by debree and EOD jumps the gun and the damm thing goes off. ANd I go to the bathroom again almost. Well, its five oclock, quiting time but we pass the gate and continu on patroling. I guess the platoon sargent forgot to look at his watch. We get to the othe side of our sector when one of the trucks fuel lines ruptures. SO we shut if off and tow it back. Glad I didn't have to ride back in that truck. Gas everywhere and people just waiting to add a spark. We get back to the gate and find out that our patrol had been extended three hours. What the fuck. So they tow the other truck in and try to find another truck to borrow and we wait outside so we dont have to clear our weapons. Well, one truck cant be found and no one can get the other team on the radio. So were waiting outside with our thumbs up our asses and after an hour we decide to go look for our guys. TO make a long story short our XO called off the rest of our patrol and no one told us. Gota love the army. SO that was my day. Today I slept in, rode around camp looking for the POG chowhall because the food better and did some training for MOUT. Thats building clearing and close combat----SWAT shit. ANd for me its a waste of time because once you know the basics and dont have a room set up its pointless because no two rooms will be the same and as long as you know how to perform the technieqes theres really nothing to go over. That and my three jobs outside on patrol are machine gunner in the turret, driver and radioman. All thrre involve me not getting out of the truck. If I have to go into a building then we will have bigger problems then how to clear a building. It will be that over half the patrol is dead I have to fight my way into a building full of assholes to get the casualties. In which case we should have----I'm nopt going to go into that. Basically it would be fucked up. Hell, that was longer then I thought it would be, gotta go work out. ANd they haven't told me when were leaving so it could be in a hour. Take care.

Love ****

Hello all. Sorry this has taken so long to get out but we have been going balls to the wall over here and our internet service is down and using these computers at the MWR tent makes me more homicidial then normal. So, the constitiution elections went off without a hitch thanks to us being on the streets all damm day but the fun picked up the day after. Then today they decided to start Saddams trial so we were expecting non stop riots and death but nothing serious happened. Except that the Iraqi Army decided to have thet're own fun by just shooting up randem buildings. These fucking assholes just open up on a building and we come charging in geared for armageddon and then the Apaches fly in hoping for something to blow up with their hellfire missles and then the 3rd ID rolls up with a "Whats going on look on their faces and what do we do" look on their faces and I have no idea what the hell your supposed to do but I'm just going to sit here behind this armour palting on my turret manning my 240 because the IA is having a field day kicking the of the non existant insurgents and good for them, thjey need someone whos ass they can kick. I want too tell yall how much I appreciate everyone writing me back with kind words of encouragement and how much yall are thinking and praying for me. Beleive me it helps. And I'm glad I can entertain yall with my Joe on the street perspective. Well, remember that big shootout we had the other day. The one where we blew the shit out of a school as it turns out, that Uncle you know who had fotted the bill to build. Well, that general who showed up was right impressed with our vigor. So much that when he got his happy ass back inside the wire he marched right over to the brigade commanders office and demeanded to know why US soldiers where obliterating a poor defenceless school. So all the NCOs had to fill out sworn statements explaining that we had recieved fire from that location and returned a resonable amount of fire back into said building. I guess the general thought we were bored and decided to go weapons hot on some random building. Sorry, were not IA sir. And didn't you tell us you saw more movement in the building after we called cease fire. But oh I shouldn't be saying these things. What are they going to do, send me here. Listen to the fucked up rules of engagment we had for the day of the elections. First before unleashing our firepower we had to escalate volume of fire. First we fire with M-4s, then SAWs, then 240, and then 50s. WOuld we have done that-------fuck no. Oh, and there were places that we had to get permission to fire on some locations. The day an infantryman waits to return fire after recieving it is the day hell freezes over. So winter has befallen our fair shithole. What is winter like in Iraq. Its eighty and it feels like twenty. Its overcast and windy so sand is everywhere. Cleaning my weapons are a never ending battle and about down to using rocks and loclking my weapons in my room. So we find new tricks. If our M-4s want to crap out we bust out antiquted M-14s. It looks like a semi automatic deer riffle and fires a 30 caliber round and love the thing. When we roll out with these new toys the dickheads will think were a bunch of snipers. Plus the thing is long as hell and you can beat the shit out of someone good with it. Did I mention it fires a 30 caliber bullet. That will put hodgy on his ass and I am a big fan of that. Hard to beleive that the M-14 went out of service in the earliy sixties. Anyways, I got a nice treat today, a new gunner and driver so I just sat my ass in the back of the truck for six hours. I like getting shot at driving better. I was in hell cramped in the back and our platoon sergent just hates stopped to stretch the legs because they may shoot at us and that would suck. This guy actually left the element the other day when we recieved fire and forgot us. We should have justy taken the initative and raided the building. It will be interesting to see what becomes of that but for now it is a nice joke. Sorry but you cant spend a decade in the ranger training brigade then come back to the line and lead vetran troops, escpecially when you dont have a CIB-------cobat infantrymans badge. Something that says some asshole took a shot at you. Well, I wish this could be longer but my time is up and the guy sitting net to me's colone is so horribel I fear I may buttstoke him with my weapon. Thanks again for your thoughts and prayers and words of encouragment. Hope all is well and I'll always write when I can.

Hello all from sand land. DOnt worry, it still sucks and tyoday was a long miserable shitty day so I have lots to rant about. First, I have to wake up even earlier because suprise, even in hell they have daylight savings time. So I got out to get my truck ready and since all our privates are off sleeping I get to do it all by my lonesome. Oh yeah I had to put the fills in the radio and no one told me to battalions in so that was fun.l All battalion would have said was we need to run to this place because someone thought they heard a insurgent fart. So anyways I have to get ice for the coolers, mount the 50, load it, grab the rest of my gear, put it in the truck, eat something while doing all this and make sure the fuckig thing starts. Then my team leader shows up and decideds that he wants me the check out the truck to see if it is leaking fluids. Well if it isn't something is wrong because it is a HMMVV. IF I didn't know better I would think they were tying to break me or doing their job for them. when confronted about this new list of bullshit proceedures I now have to undertake I was told it was for my leadership building. What fucking leadership building, I have to do all this shit myself. It funny how no one helps but if the truck spontaniuosly combusts its my ass. One morning i think I am going to go out and just rip out all the oil lines and piss in the gas tank. SO off we go to patrol and I'm already pissed off and tired but have a great Red Bull rush for a few hours. But the morning drags on and on and riding in the hot seat as I call it in the turret has a way of emotionaly and physically tiring you so five hours seems like week just watching hodgy and his shithole life go by with my machinegun in their faces. Occasionally I have to jump us and yell at them to get back an if he doesnt comply to my liking I fire a round of buckshot in the air. Ok, our shotguns have pistol grips and no buckstock. Do you know what firing a shotgun into the air without it pressed to your sholder feels like. It not like in the movies when some asshole action heor has one in each hand and is firing them off a dozen a second. Slam your wrist in a car door and thats what it feels like. THen after that painul episode I go imediatly to my machinegun but by then hodgy knows what coming next, a long string of half inch armour piercing incenderary bullets so he quicly hits his brakes and I'm left with a throbbing wrist and have to explain the locals were once gain driving with their head up their asses. How they do it I do not know. SO after the patrol that tie forgot we come back and eat chow and are told that the Battaional Commander has decided to jon us and could we be ready in two hours. Ever see someone jump throug their ass. Thats what we looked like because the o9ld man was coming out with us and we had to be perfect. Well, I could give a shit. Were red hot and we dont fuck up much like our brothers in the fabled Alpha company. In under two months those dickheads have managed to lose ten weapons, get caught in half brained ambushes and blow the foot off one of our cleaning guys. The words dickheads doesn't seem to fit. Five platoon leaders relieved, thats record in the **** I think. Those guys are so fucked up they would have to shoot one of their own guys to get better. Theres a little thing Alpha is known for and if your an infantrymen it is the biggest faux pax their is. Accidental Discharging your weapon or AD. It bad because when you do it you ussually have no idea where your barrel is pointed and its ussually at your buddies head. Luckily only a romanian shithouse cleaner has felt Alpha incompantace yet but the year is young. They should take all their ammo away and be done with it. SO Ads are real bad and on the way out the gate we stop to load our weapons when BLAAADDDAAA!!!!!!!!! Right the hell behind me and I hear my asshoel snap shut because it looks like we are now the new village idiots. I look over at our PL and I can see his career crumble before his eyes nd my top gunner is chussing a mile a minute and I heard a PING and that was a 240 that puts out fifteen 7.62 rounds a second and oh shit is anybody hit. No, and the ultimate irony is that it is the Battalion Commanders gunner. As he had his head up his ass he loaded the weapon with the bolt back. Well, when you do this any jolt with force the bolt forward and it starts spitting out rounds like some ghetto cheerleader at a wrong side of town football game. The rounds struck the back of the gunners armour tub and went who knows. Well, the BC got out of his truck and had the ultimate hangdog look. Here hes pissed at one of his companies for this ultimate sin and his personle gunner just stuck his own head so far up his own ass he could see what he had last week for lunch. So we had to delay the trip for a half hour while they got a new gun, appearently it was malfunctioning. Yeah, putting a dickhead at the other end will do that And off we went. Now, I was driving the PL because as RTO that is where you go. You drive and listen to the Platoon leader tell you where he thinks he smells insurgents and monitor the radio and listen to other peoples horror stories over the radio net. Now, I was pulling this gig because my team leader figured that since I always ride in the hot seat I could use a break and learn a new trade. It was more stressfull then gunning because you have to listne to two radio broadcasts, a PL and a sergent give directions and lookout for obstructions that coudl takemy gunners head off. And traffic sucks too. So the whole time the PL is praying for action, the gunner is praying for frsh cut tree limbs and high powerlines, the sergent is praying that we can hurry up and finish so he can go to finish his book and I'm praying that I dont lose my mind. Well, we come to a house we need to search. We get out andI pull security for my gunners back so a sniper doesn't give him a one way tickey out of sanland. Well, guess who comes up for a chat. The BC, walks right up to me and gets in my line of sight and asks "So how is it going so far not getting blown up today Mr. Army Man?" Holy shit he knows my name, its on my uniform but he knows that it is little ole me that has been actracting all the IEDs. "Uh, great sir trying to look past him and make sure I dont see golpher heads on the roof, a sure sign of ashole planning to start the fireworks. Well he goes on the say how he doesnt mind blown up vehicles but not blown uop men and what do I think of the newuparmour HMMVVs. Well, I'm still here with all my fingers and toes so I love the damm things. Really, he seems like a good guy, he came in a talked to me for a while one day back in *** when I was working Battalion staff. He asked me what I thoguht back then and wanted to know what I was thinking about things because he said the only way to get to the truth was asking a specialist. So he was smart. ANd I figured he'd listen so I told him. I pissed sir because we are getting ready to leave for Iraq and most of the battalion 240s are broke. Well, that pissechinm off because those lazy assholes in beancounting couldn't find the money to give his Joes the weapons we needed and he was on the phone everyday looking for a way to get them. He then wento n about how a 240 gunner is the most importantr job in the platoon because we keep the bad guys heads down. o he was really smart. Theonly time I ever talked to my last BC was when we were doing a streess shoot with pistols ad I had to tell the guys firing where the safty was and how to be safe caring a sidearm. It funny but infantrymen dont play with pistols too much. If have to use it you have really fucked up somewhere so we never train with them. Well, the old BC just happened to be observing this and walked rightup to me on a live range and asked why was I telling the men to do something they should already know. I told him because most of the guys nevervfired a sidearm before in theri lives or held one and didn't know where the safty was and second because even though I was wearing body armour and helmet, I didnt want to get shot. Sir. Well, he gave me a look I could figure out like, what the heel doesn this dumbass specialist know my men dont know how to fire a pistol or maybe, yeah, I should have thought about that but anyways he walked off, got his full bird colonel and off the genral staff he went. But this new guy is good and thats all that matters. I'll get into our new Battalion Sergent major another day. I'll just say that mechanized infatry should stay there. They bring too many rules with them. See, most of our leadership comes from the Rangers, Special Ops, airborne, light infantry. We know that how you fight is beter then how you look. Not mechanized infantry with their Bradley fighting vehicles or as I call them, Coffins on treads. They like to look nice and pretty and they're in the army so look like it. Its horse shit and their record shows. You can also run three light infantry battalions for what it cost to run one mech battalion so they suck. Anyways, after another five hour patrol, thats ten hours in one day, no wonder I want to just stare at the wall, we got home adn praise the lord nothing was wrong with my truck and we got done by nine. I'm not doing a single thing tommorrow because something big is in the works so we were told to get rest because we'll be going balls to the wall in a couple of days. I can hardley wait. At least I have a pass coming up next week. If they take that away from me I may join the other side. Well, I hope all is well back home. I hear yall are melting away. My sympathies!!!!!!!!!!! Take care and hope to hear rom you all soon.

Love, ****

Whats up? No I dont have any picture on my digital camera because I haven't taken it out yet. I am more worried about bringing mre ammo and water. Next time I go out I'll bring it though. I know how hungry your fan are for the true horror of this place. This nightmare isnt a nine to five job. When I dont e-mail its because I;m busy either on patro or doing some bullshit or sitting in my hootch staring at the wall deciding if I want to go crazy or not. belive me I write e-mails whenevr i get a chance. Its one of the things I look forward too. Sorry my spelling sucks but I ussually write these things after missions and before I got to sleep. I really appreciate that you set up the sight though. Everyone here is impressed as shit that people back home care like that. They also request more pictures of ---------------fuck, mortor round just went off, fuck it, it wasn't close and they're already returning fire. Oh yeah, more pictures of beautiful women. I got everyone wanting to come home to see what hot bitches are runninhg around Austin. As soon as I get some good pictures I send them to you. I kind of like having a my own blog!!!!!!!!!!Take care and looking forward to all the beer we'll drink when Iget home.

Hello all. Well, another day aother IED blew me up. Dont worry, I'm alright. So far these are just fuel bombs because were patroling so much they cant put good ones in. My company commander told me tonight I lead the battalion in near misses. Yippy do. My guardian agnles are going to give me hell whenI get to the house which better be in seventy years. So, we have been doing such a good job that the Battalion commander wants to come out with us tommorrow to see what our secret is. What does his mean? That we have to prepare even earlier andgo over a bunch of dumb shit and answer his quetions and have him change what works because hes God and this is his battalion so just do it. I may just wake up tomorrow and tell them I have shell shock and need bed rest. But no, without me out there some IEDs may not go off and someone else that isnt lucky may find them and and that would be bad. Man, being a dismount looks fun. While I sit in the gun turret begging to be shot by a sniper the dismounts get to go out and kick in peoples doors and search houses. Must be nice. Oh, and as a aded bonus tonight I had to man the gun, pull security and monito the radios because the only other people around were the medic who if it doesn't involve patching holes he doesnt give a shit about-------doesn't even lock and load his weapon!!!!!!!!! and the idiot private headquarters platoon gave us who seems intent on ramming my head into a low tree branch or power or jumo throw my ass out of the turret. How I dont have a broken rib or arm is beyond me. I know I have internal bleeding somewhere. The dude doesnt even know how to check the oil when we do the after combat checks. Just sits there smoking a cigerett and shooting the shit. I'd make him help but then things would get really fucked up and the tires would fall off or engine shoot out of the truck. Well, I need to go shower, my uniform is sticking to my body and my hair fels like I dipped it in a salt pile. Hope all is well.

Love, ****

Innocent Blood 9-24-05

Well, today was a real piece of shit day. On patrol this morning we wee driving down my favorite road code named Ceder. Its a real shithole that the Louisanna boys warned us about. Its where we always get blown up and this moring was no exception. Except when the bomb went off instead of getting us they got three small boys waving hello to us. Blew one kids face off, took anothers leg and hand and burned the shit out of the last one. The fater in his distress grad the one that was burned and took him to the Iraqi hospitol where he most likly died and our medic who is Johnyy on the spot managed to stabilze the other two and we rushed them back to our doctors where I'm told they pull through. Now, I'm a professional soldier, as funny as that sounds, and if push comes to shove and I have no other option I have to demolish a car a night with my fifty cal because they wont stop and we know their are VBEDs but I'll be goddammed if I am going to knowingly kill children to engage my enemy. And thats the real bitch of this palce is that soooner or latter I'm going to have to make that choice. because thats why my unit was sent here, to kill insurgents. No sugar coating it, no "Where here to win hearts and minds". We're here to killmotherfuckers and after today and witnessing the barbarism that this enemy employes, I have no problem. But I wont put a innocent childs life in danger unless it is abbsolutly positivly the last fucking option. I still have to look myself in the mirror ever day and knowin that I injured or killed someone if I had other options is not something I want hanging over my head for the rest of my life. To say that we are all a little pissed off would be a vast understatement. We spent all night tonight beating on doors looking for someone to pummle an even cruised cedar street again begging someone to take us on. Tommorow we all have to go talk to he chaplin so that should be a joy. Whats he going to do. He'll ask "Are we upset?" Fuck yeah. "Do we have violet tedencies?" Yes, what the hell do you think were doing in the infantry. " Do you want to harn anyone?" Absolutly, the cocksuckers that would try to kill children in order to kill us with a explosive device that wouldn't even chip our paint or make us wet ourselves. Well, almost, I got hit with a piece of shrapnal that bounced off my eyewear. It might have broke the skin had it hit flesh. I saw a interstying thing on tv before we left where some US soldiers caught a insurgent and he started blabbering about the Geneva convention. For all those out there who wander what the geneva convention means is this. Jack shit, its a outdated set of rules that never really apply except to us becasue we ar the United States of freedom and all that happy horseshit in the white hat. Alright, if by somebgad twist of fate I get captured--------very doughtful, I'll learn to flap my arms and fly home with the ducks before that happens, I can look forward to having my balls riped off on Al Jazeer tv and burned alive. For these cocksuckers, according to the geneva convention all sodiers in uniform shall be accorded certain rights that I wont go into like torture, presevation of life and not to be displayed. OK, so those fuck up in the National guard are dumbshits but hey, their fuck ups, what did they think would happen? But we safeguard them, feed them, let them pray and all that shit. Well, mostly but thats another story and I'm not going into SF and what those boys do. We have the Iraqi army if we want the assholes to talk fast. But by definition insurgent aren't soldiers. According to the geneva convention anyone carrying a weapon in a warzone without uniform is either a spy or a criminal and should be shot on sight. No problem. Well, my rage has subsided. I'm tired and want to forget about this day. I know this is a graphic e-mail and hope it doesn't upset any of you. I have been sitting here for ten minutes tryng to decide if I should send it but I figure yall should know what its like over here. If anyone doesn't wish for me send anymore to you let me know and I'll understand. I wish I could forget all about this place and the fear and anger and hatred that comes fro this place. But there are miricles too. Like our medic and two other soldiers who saved those two kids lives. And how no matter what when are on the street each others lives are more important then our own. I see it ever day. I work with heros. These guys that drive me crazy and I want to kill are the only way I'm coming home. If nothing else comes out of this shithole then I got to see heros in action and was proud to be at their side. That is why I joined the infantry. And again, to whoever rememebred us in their prayers, thank you. These guys and the good lord are only only way I'm getting out this place alive. Love you all.

****

My Last Nerve 9-23-05

Well, I hope yall are ready because the past wo days have sucked and there are only one brand of assholes to blame for my lack of sanity. POGs. Those sons of bitches that have nothing better to do but show up in a warzone and start laying out gay ass fucking rules and sitting around on their fat asses drinking pepsi and bitching about how stressful their boring existance of lives are. So, Yesterday we head up to the NAC, Neighborhood Action Committee, a oraginzation of the locals how sit around and thin about how they can bring this place farhter out of the stone age. Hint, your religion and culter suck and will never fit in with western society so b content with your sand and just give us the fucking oil. While doing this we have to be ready to pounce on the assholes who are planning to raid a school and burn ten children alive to get the politcal message across. But alas, the moring went off without incident and I ws able to come back and grab a few hours nap. Good fucking thing because last night was busy. We head out on ato and after three hours of mind numbing patroling my happy ass gets blown up again!!!!!!!!!!!!!! No worries, we are all fine because the stupid bastards put the explosive in and pointed it strait up. I guess they saw a helicopter or something. My fucking heart stopped though and still have a head ache. Assholes. Then we pull around to inspect the damage right in the middle of the killzone. This is something you never ever do and today the Company commander and battalion commander and proabbly his momma chewed our PLs ass for him. So that sucked and it was tiem for us to come home when over the radio some Iraqi army guys say they found a road bomb. The fuckers probably put the damm thing their so off we go to secure the site because we cant have any civilians setting it off or the dickhead insurgents relizing they fucked up and come grab to put in a better spot. So we get there and wait, and wait, and wait, and wait all night for EOD or Explosive ordanance Disposal to show up and save the day. We waited almost five hours for those guys and I have never had so much trouble staying awake as I did last night while pulling secuity. Oh, and our damm radios where running our of power so I was real anxious to get back. In my tuck it was my team leader, me, the Doc, and worthless private, and a dumbass motorman who could drive to save his life. Mexicans. So EOD shows up, pull out their robot to dismantle the anti tank mine and we get to come home. But a big ass convoy showed up at the gat before we did so we got to wait a while for them to get cleared and that was like a Houston rush hour traffic jam. Only with less guns. SO I take the HMMVV to get it checked out and just beat the rush. SO I'm happy as the devil in hell because I'll be done in no time and hey I'll even help with the maintanence when the damm cap for the air filter breaks and the mechanic comes up and says, Fucking infantrymen, always breaking shit and stealing my tools. Cocksucking asshole, he did not just say that to me. BUt he outranked me so I choose my words right. I just said. Hey, sargent, how long do you think your going to take because WE went outside the WIRE, and WE are really tired. We got shot at today and blown up and coming down to do this horseshit is really driving us apeshit. -------side note, they just added a shitload of paper work to fix the trucks that need to be filled out before the grease monkeys will even look at them. I got something for that. I just dont take the piece of shit down there and change the oil and fluids myself. SO anyways the guy makes a face like he wants to do or say somethin but by now all us infantrymen we standing around so he just went right along with fixing the truck and got me on my way. I expected to hear soething about it today but if something was siad soemone higher up told told to fuck off and not come out from under the trucs. I hate being an ass to mechanics but while they do have a shitty job fixing our fuck ups, they have no idea hwat its like outside. Why did you jump that curb at fifty. Because they were shoting RPGs at me and friends in trouble. Why is their a dent here. Some hodgy motherfucker wasn't wathcing where he was going so I rammed him. WHy is there some Iraqi stricking out from under the grill--------no comment. Oh litle side story, they gave us a bunch of toys to hand out to children yesterday, you know, we're the infedils and we're here to give you presents. BUt they went everwhee and didn't have room for them and had to get to the meeting so we came up ith a faster way of getting the toys to the needy. As we drove along when we saw a group of kids standing by the road we would throw out a few of the toys. Well, we would throw out say two toys for six kids are were treated to a quick spectical of something we call Jawwa wrestling. Thats when the local kids fight over whatever is thrown to them be it chocolate, toys, MREs, trash, ect. Well, this one kid on crutches came out of no where and started beating the shit out of the other kids with his crutch. See, they fight to the death over our shit so its kind of like atching a pack of wolves fight over a rabbit. Is this cruel, yes. Is it helping us win the war, in a sick way yes. Would news crew love to know about our entertainment, most definatly. Will we continue to enjoy our games, bet your sweet ass. Hey, entertainment is hard to come by here. You have to take what you can get. So I go to bed a five thirty this morning and was woken up at nine and told to go out to the trucks. After stumbling out to the trucks I was informed that one of the fucking fifty cals was broken. How the hell you break a eighty pound machine gun is beyond me but leave it to Joe. Well, I didn't use the fifty last nigth so it wasn't my problem and back to bed I went. Then I went to chow. Now, you cant eat chow inside the chow hall if your in workout cloths so you have to get it to go and eat outside or in your hootch. We always eat outside on the picknic tables. Well, today we were informed that we coul no longer eat there after we were half way done. FOur fucking cook POGs came by to inform us of the new change. I guess they have nothing better to do but make sure the guys from KBR do their job and cause sexual scandles. So this is why POGs are on my shitlist. Because they have nothing better to do in a warzone but make it more stressful. And these are the assholes who crack under pressure and shoot themselves. Maybe thats what the salisbury steak was today. Well, I gotta go deleiver the mail. They get restless if they dont get their mail but then again so do I. Hope all is well and I miss you all.

Love ****

What Comes Around 9-21-05

Hello all. I couldn't send out a e-mail last night because they were shut down because some guys from my company got motored yesterday but dont worry, their all fine with superficial wounds. But man are they pissed. We got there a few minutes afterward and took off after where we thought the rounds came from. Shook down and few people and made no headwaves. Yesterday was a long motherfucker. We left at two in th morning and were out till six thirty and then went back out from one to seven in the afternoon. But we found some dickheads who were trying to deleiver explosives. Mind you these indivduals were probably the cocksuckers that tried to blow me up a few days ago so I wanted to run my own interagation. But instead a few gentlemen came in with no unit patches or nametags for that matter and I knew our new friends werein good hands. When your in a warzone and somebody shows up looking wit a sterle uniform with no patches you know not to ask questions. THese guys know how to do things that make you want to cry for your momma. Dont ask, dont tell and if good intell comes your way just be grateful. Were getting stretched pretty thin around here and its only going to get worse when the election come around. WHoever said the war is over hasn't been oin the streets around here. Its not over, ordinary people are just going on with their lives is all. Oh yeah, they want to make me a RTO or radio man-------------fuck that. The RTO has to set up all the radios which sucks, talk to battalion and they're a bore and operate a few other things I cant tell you about but you had better be good at computers and it took me a month to understand my PS2 which five year olds master in hours. Plus, I'm the only guy in my group who knows all the tricks to the machineguns and set them up right and I'm not doing both jobs anda private will only fuck it up so find someone else. I think that we have pretty much fucked up the HMMVVS enough for the mechanics. Everytime we come back in something else is broken and I know why. The HMMVV is rated at two and a half tons of carrying capacity. WIth the armour and gear and guns and water and batering rams and chains and childproof seat and beer they weight in at over fiveand a half tons tons. So they have over twice the weight they should have. And still keep going. Only aChevy which makes HMMVVs now. Of course thediesle engine sucks. The mechanics worry if it isnt leaking oil. Well, I cant think of anything else to rant about and need to get to sleep. Hope all is well.

****

Too Tired 9-19-05

Hello everyone back in the real world. Hope all is well and you had a great weekend. I was just told that it was sunday here so I missed my weekend. Dyas dont matter her anyways. Well, had a uneventful patrol yesterday which is nice. But, their out there wait and plotting the cocksuckers. Oh, yall like this. So, the ING or Iaqi National guard, the guys were trainig to do our job so we can get the fuck out of here, flag us down yesterday and tell us they know where a bunch of insurgents are. Thats some good shit so off we go. When we get to the house the only person who is their is some old lady with a passel of kids and a fucking 82 millimeter motor roun in her roof and since we are the americans with nothing but money and food can we fix it. Now we have PL with us or Platoon Leader and officers just cant seem to say no because you know, their gentlemen. So we ccall EOD, the guys whos job it is to blow up bombs. No, not a job I want, I fucking hate things that can liquidfy you in less time it take to blink an eye. So we wait, and wait and wait and wait and end up waiting for the EOD guys to get there. OUr whole patrol was spent waiting for them to get there and when they did they took one look at the motor round and just blew it up on sight. I have no idea what it did to the ladies roof but its a good thing it doesn't rain here often. That will teach her to call the gringos when shes in trouble. Then on the way home we decided to take a shortcut and ended up getting all except my truck stuck. This is why yankees shouldn't drive off road and letting a mexican drive should be avoided at all costs. So I'm having to pull out other HMMVVs an we have a MSR, you know, those roads they love to take pop shots at us from and have two sargents yelling different instructions at me and would yall just shut the fuck up and let me do it before we get lit the fuck up because someone had their head buried up their ass. And after a relativly easy night out and getting to call home I was looking forward to sleeping in this morning. But no, my roomate decided it was tiem to wak up at nine to start watching tv. Cocksucking asshole. And I told him so. Ever meet someone with a face you just want to punch in. Thats my roomate. Hes always coming up with hairbrained ideas and forgeting his shit and asking me to get it for him and one day I'm just going to thrwo a fucking incenidary grenade in his bunk. Yall would love those things. Just a little grenade that gets over four thousand degrees hot with activated. It will burn a hole all the way through a tank. I've seen one set of and it is a sight to behold. But as stated before explosives scare the shit out of me so fuck it. Well, I'm going to try an find a place to nap. OH, and I missed the damm Tech game. Hope all is well.

Love ****

Comp Day 9-17-05

Hello all. Well, the and never looked so beautiful and the sky so blue as it did this morning. Ok, bullshit. I didn't wake up feeling like that. SO I go blown up twice last night. I doudt it will be the last time before I leave hell that it happens. Life goes on and you soldier on and do waht you can to make it home. My LT came in to see me this afternoon to amke sure I wasn't having any problems with last night. Aside from being in near shock all last night and unable to sleep I was fine. He then told me that battalion filledo ut a casualty feeder card on my ass. That means the fucking press knew and reported that last night their was a roadside bomb and a casualty was taken. Fucking dickheads. Now hodgy thinks he scored one last night. Fuck them. I got something for those fuckers now. Anyways, not to worry. It made it all aorund the camp that I was the luckiest fuckers here because everyone has come up to tell me so. Maybe I should try the lottery. Ohyeah, our HMMVV is still in the shop because they dont have the parts or they wont get off their fat asses to fix the truck so we go out in three trucks now. Perfect for getting hit with a ambush. This place gets better all the time. Anyways the battalion pecker checker cleared me of any medical problems today so tommorrow the hunt begins. I have decided that I haven't been shooting enough bullets. It not like were paid to bring the shit back and I do just love shooting a massive machinegun that fires a bullet the size of a hotdog. Well, I went and bought a bunch of pirated movies today. I got Batman begins, Brothers Grim, Great Raid, Willy Wonka------dont ask, and a few others. I bet the faggots in hollywood would love to know how much money their losing here. I should send them a copy the homos. I can just see the frenzy it would cause. Maybe they'll have a seggment of that gay fucking show Over there about it with a little infomercial at the end about how pirating movies is wrong. Dickheads. Well, thats my tangent for the day. Tommorrow I head back out to the shooting gallery. If I get bombed again I'm handing in my two weeks notice. These are not safe working conditions. Hope all is well and to those of you who are going out this weekend and telling me how much fun and beer your going to drink, piss off. We have all the non alcoholic beer and sheer terror, which makes up for fun than we can shake a stick at.

Love, ****

The Big Bang 9-16-05

Well, one of you was praying their asses off this morning because I'm still here in one piece. I got blown up twice in two hours. This is definetly the worst fucking day I hve ever had in my whole life and I have had some real shitty ones. So, we're out on patrol and I'm pulling rear security driving down the road. Fat dumb and happy like a bunch of slob joes because the platoon leader is with us and hes got his ranger tab and we all knew something bad was going to happen. So we're driving along when all the sudden I see a flash and feel a concussion wave knock me forward in the turret and I feel something hit the back of my helmet and my neck goe numb, but I can still kneel inside the truck and start asking if everyone is ok. They ask me if I'm ok. I say yeah but I think something hit my head. SO we clear the area and the whole time I'm thinking, great, I might have a piece of shrapnal stuck in my neck but I feel fine and dont smell blood but its too dark to see so we pull over a mile away and the look me over------a side note, my team leader used to be a fireman and had a friend send us nomex neck covers to protect our skin from fire. SO anyways doc looks me over, I'm coherent, but the back of my neck is a little red so they decide to come back to have the checked out to see if I have anything wrong. The doctor runs a bunch of reflex tests on me to cohersion questions to make sure I'm alright. Apart from a bad headache I'm fine so I get back in the truck to finish our shift. Not even a hour latter almost at the same exact spot "BOOOM" but this one is a hell of alot louder and I get knocked to my knees. Well, the sons of bitches did it too us again, not just us but me. This time all kind of bad shit happens. The truck is full of smoke and I can smell fuel leaking and our driver is really pleased because the fucking tires, all of them, have been blown out and hes yelling about how he just knew this would happen and, hey dickheads, I'm the one with my upper torso sticking up out of the turrest with little protection. Well, the LT is too busy telling battalion that we just got lite the fuck up again and the driver is yelling because a big chunk of bullet proof glass is missiing and the young private in the back just pissed himself and what the hell, I'm still not nicked. OUr truck at least makes it too a secured area so we hitch it to another HMMVV and tow the fucker back. We get to the mechanics and they are just so happy to see us but fuck them, I got blown up twice in one night so fix the motherfucker. The reason why the second bomb was so loud, and this makes me want to really sit in the gun turret now, they put the goddamm thing in a tree leval with my head. I really want to kill these assholes now. BUt hey, this is war. Actually, I think I'm still is shock. That was really fucking close tonight. ANd this shit is real!!!!!!!!!!!!!What the fuck was I thinking coming here. At least I didn't piss or shit myself. I guess thats something. SO, that was my day. At least I dont have shit to do tommorrow. ANyways, I'm alive and in one piece and to whoever it was who remembered me in their prayers this morning, thank you

****

The Fun Never Stops 9-12-05

hello everyone. This one is going to be short because I'm tired as hell. Well, after pulling late terp guard two nights ago which sucked because one of them had a bad case of jock rot I was informed that I had to back up earliy the next day for another guard duty on my day off. SO my happy ass was sitting guard a the Bazaar all fucking day. What is a Bazaar you ask. A shithole flea market where the locals pettle their shit to us dumb gringos. ANd we actually buy it. I tell you, if you buy and hunk of shit curry pot or metal painting and pay forty dollars for it and cart the fucking thing home with you then you seserve to be beaten in the face with it until you either learn your lesson or are put out of my misery. Stupid thrive in warzones. Take one our dumb ass privates. SO we got shot at twice today and on our second trip out to find him we stop and are pulling security. I'm sitting i nthe armoured HMMVV monitering the radios when I look over at the private in question. SOmething is odd about him I wander and it takes me a while to place it. HE didn't have his fucking helmet on. The dickhead was actually pulling securtity outside the vehicle in a warzone with no K-pot on his head. I yelled "HEy dickhead, you forgot something?" He looked at me like I had a dick growing off my forhead. I pointed to my helmet and I swear he actually reached up grabbed his booney hat and still didn't get it. I yelled " Put you fucking k-pot on asshole" and then you could actually see the lightbulb go off over his head. HE gave me a retarded smile and said "Oh shit." Oh shit is right. Then we get back tonight and I have to go and fix the damm HMMVV because the piece of shit fell apart again. Go figure. It could be worse, the 3rd Infantry faggot had one of their Bradleys break on a heavily traveled MSR. Those are hiways that the bad guys love to bomb, mortor, drive by, piss on, pray, and god knows what else. Basically, you do not want to go on one and here we are towing a thirty ton piece of shit down one. Well, I need to go to sleep and get some peace before this nightmare starts all over again. Love and miss you all.

****

Warning Shots 9-10-05

Hello all. Well sometimes common sence prevails. This is not one of those times. Last night on a patrol there was a, well, incident. Now that we have been here a while these assholes are trying to test us to see what they can get away with like the pestelent children that they are. By this I mean driving there cars too close for our comfort. So we hve to fire off warning shots to get them to comply. Mostly there drunk and got there head up they're ass or thinkning about some little boy the sick bastards. Well, one of the turds got to close and the guy in the turret for I have no idea what reason, fired a warning shot at the hood of the car. Well, the problem was that while it did provide the proper motivation to stop his car to a screaming halt when little round pellet hit metal and a excelerated pace and hit a hard surface at a low angle they tend to riccocett. In this case right into some average Iraqis upper torso. So, the guys had a wounded civilian, a lack of leadership and alot of confusion. It was luckily sorted out quickly enough and determened that it was in fact us who shot him. Johnny Cochran must be smiling in hell at such litigation this was turning out. Most likly fift bucks and a whole hearted appology will sufice. Anyways, so now you have a bunch of scared kids with loads of destruction and some Iraqi national palabering who knows what and so they load him in the HMMVV to bring him back. And no one wants to tough him because hes bleeding out all over the place and just moaning. That was all the story I got last night when the guys came back looking like shit run over twice. I haven't even seen anyone today but I can already hear the asschewing for it. You dickhead top gunners, from now on fire your warning shots in the air. No problem boss. Taking all our ammuniton away is right around the corner I can feel it. Fear not though, when the soldier who fired the shot was asked about it his reponce was, " He shoudln't have been standing there." True, none of these people are that innocent. If they were then we would have line of them out the gate giving us information about where the assholes live. Thats not true. Most are hard working and just want to live their lives. But we could get soem more help. If we weren't paying such good prices then we coldn't even get interprature help. I mean all these guys have to do is go out into their neighborhood with a platoon of heavily armed professional soldiers and talk to their neighbors. And we give them body armour to boot. Anyways, thats my rant for the day. I'll have more for you I promise. Next it will be about the mail which I'm never here to do and have guys coming up wheres my mail, I want my mail. Thats right, I'm now a cetified mail handler so when I'm done with this place I can go work at the post office and lose my marbles there. Hell no. Old ladies cussing me out, dogs nipping at my ass. Well, take care and miss you all and think of yall often.

Love ****

More Complaining 9-09-05

Hello all. just a quick one today because I just got off terp guard and I have yo be up at six tommorrow to go out on patrol. And this was supposed to be my day to relax. I've been on the go all damm day. Well, let me tell you about Alpha company. The other night the dickheads go out on a company patrol and on the way back in when they stop at the gate to clear their weapons of ammo they had a AD or accidental discharge on the fifty cal. Well, some poor romanian smuck who was doing god knows what just happened to be at the wrong place and time when that big ass bullet came flying at him. Took his whole fucking lower leg off. Well, a couple days latter they made the guy who shot him, which wasn't his fault, he wasn't cetified to use that weapon system, never even toughed it before that night, but anyways he goes to see him and the guy is actually happy and forgave the young private. How could this be so you ask. Well, because Uncle you know who bought him off and now the dudes family is set for life. But there are ripple effect as there always are. Now when we roll out of the wire our weapons cant be charged meaning they have ammo in them but you have to cock them before mean little bullets come out. ANd with a fifty you have to doudle cock it. So when a car comes flying at my happy ass loaded with c4 and other fun things I first have to give him the sign to stop, show him my shotgun, fire a warning shot, drop the shotgun, double charge the fifty, aim the big bastard at the moving car which will be right at my happy ass, then fire. Fuck that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I might as well stick my head between my ass and kiss it goodbye or jump out of the turet and haul ass. You see, Sargent majors are the most worthless job in the army. They have nothing to do but think up stupid shit. OUrs likes to drive around on his M-gator a little six wheel ATV and look for soldiers who are out of uniform. Like wearing camo pants but no shirt or not having a hat on. Or smoking too close to the hotches. Nothing imporant like finding more ammo or the rest of our body amrour------don't worry I got all mine. THats what happens when you bring a mechinized infantry guy to a light infantry unit. Common sence goes right out the fucking window. Every mech infantry guy I have seen are all the same. They're garrison soldiers. They do things by the book and its horseshit in a war zone. Oh yeah, I found out the trash ladies in our area are also whores. Thats the most disgusting thing I have heard around here and this place is a shithole. Blame it on the louisanna boys for bringinig this place down to their leval of professionalism. Assholes. Well, I gotta go grab something to eat. Hope all is well. Miss you all and think of yall often

Love ****

Hello 9-8-05

Jackpot homies. They just put in a new internet shop behind my hotch--------a hotch is where I sleep by the way. Its nice and cool until my roommate decides hes cold and turn down the AC. Not a good idea because when I wake up sweating I get violent. I had enough sleeping and sweating in Kuwait. Well, I'm off in a a couple of hours to say hello to the locals. Hope they dont shot at me. Since jack shit has happened in our sector since we have been here it leads me to beleive two things------we scared them off, not likly or worse, they're planning something big. The way that wee stoping a talking to people screams our that we want to be shot at. But believe me looks can be decieving. Were here looking for trouble. We know they're here because the used car lot we sw a few days ago had a bunch of cars with syrian licences tags. Oh, let me tell you about what happened last night when we were coming back in. So I'm on the fifty cal------thats a big awsome machinegun, pulling rear security in the convy when I see a stream of green lights coming my way. Well, I thought they were tracers and ducked down behind the armour plating. The medic in the back asks whats wrong and before I can tell him we were just shot at it hits me---------there are no green tracers. I look back over the plating and see that its first platton using a laser to get people out of the way. I felt like a ass but would have really been laughing stock had I said something. But damm, with the dust and the darkness it looked just like tracers from a machinegun. I was so pissed off at myself I wanted to shot at the assholes but I guess I learned something, I dont know what but I learned it. Tommorrow is interprature guard duty. Even though these guys are our friedns we cant just let them wander around. And beides they begail us with stories like killing there daughters because there husbands claim they were unfaithful and catching there sons fucking the family goat and how we are unclean people because we use toilet paper and not our hands to wipe our asses. Well, I gotta run to get ready for patrol. Hope all is well and kick those asshole cajuns out of Texas-----we have all the assholes we need there as it is.

Love, ****

In the Shit 9-7-05

Hello all. Sorry I haven't been able to get back with yall for a while but we have been hoping here since last I wrote. Well, I survived my outings with the louisanna national guard the dumb fucks. I do feel sorry for them. They leave this shithole after a year just to go home to find out that its floated away. Thats our revenge for them fucking up this place. We sent a hurricane to wipe out there homes. Just imagine a crazy cajun in this place and you can understand why were in a foul mood. So, my first trip out with them and sure enough we roll up on a school that has a suspected sniper team in it. Well, as soon as I heard the words sniper team you could hear my asshole snap shut from kuwait. Then we get out and the dumb assholes just start walking around in the middle of the street. Me, my happy ass is trying like hell to merge into the side of a brick wall. Then they decide to clear the building with six people-----------fucking idiots. You don't do that without at least a platoon or a airstrike. Luckily no one was home but if they had been it wold have been me standing on a corner of the building laughing , crying and cursing those idiots while screaming for medics, reinforcements, covering fire, a cold beer, and a nuclear bomb. On that first trip out they roll us by the mosqe where every ashole in our sector that wants to do us, me in pecticular bodily harm are hanging out. Want to know what someone who wants nothing more then to blow you head off looks like. Like they aren't even human because you can't imagine anyone hating you that much for being from another country and religion. Well, fuck them. I did get shot at that night by some dickhead who was probably three blocks down with his head up his ass. I was in the turret minding my own busssiness when all the sudden "Crack" thats all you hear when a bullet passes by you. Well, I dropped down in the hole and yelled shots fired and the driver turns around and say" Hey, sniper, Stay down." Thank you very fucking much dickhead. Its funny, I wasn't scared, just really pissed off that I could figure out where it came from. On the way home is when it hit me, hey, there are people here that want to kill you.What the hell was I thinking coming here. Then I thought about what movie I was going to watch while cleaing my weapon and that was it. The only action I have seen so far. OUr friendly hodgys are telling us the locals are scared of us because we have the new uniforms and they think were some kind of super commandos. Good, take your bussiness to another AO and let us do our time in peace. One cool thing, when you drive around here, everyone gets the hell out of your way and thats sayiong alot for these people. They drive worse then mexicans if its possible. You dont want to slow down because some dickhead with a RPG might think your too good a target to pass up. Well, I have the best seat in the house. I'm the top gunner so I see it all. It my job to look for snipers, road bombs, anit coalition grafiitti----no, I cant read jirka jirkastany---suspected insurgents, crimes, the lost ark and waldo. We go out for a while and to keep things interesting we came up with a game. We cant let other cars get within fifty meters of us because they may be VBEDs or vehicle bourne explosive devices. THese cocksuckers version of kamakazees. ANd everyone here likes to test our limits like the pestilant children they are. So if they get to close we tell them by sticking our 50 cal machine gun in there face. But what really gets there attention is the boom stick. Just a simple 12 gauge shotgun. Man they stop quick when they see that. What you do is let them think they may get by you and then you pull that bitch out. If you can get them to lock up there brakes thats 10 points. If you get them to cause a car wreck thats 100 points. So far I', leading the pack. Now everyone knows about it and wants in on the action. Sergents are wants to ride in the hot seat now. It will change after we hit the first road bomb or IED-----little presents they leave for us called Improvised explosive devices. Every time we go out we have a gaggle fuck of little kids following us wanting candy or money. Who the hell do we look like, Santa Clause!!!!!!!!!!!! Get a job that doen't include making bombs. I'd reafirm my hatred of POGs but I'd just end up throwing this computer against the wall. Well, I need to run, my time was up on this thing thirty mintues ago and if the dude running this place comes up to remind me I'll punch him in the face and get kicked out. Spoil sports. I think about yall all the time and miss yall tons-----fuck, gotta love the army, we got a new zip code, its 09376. Everything else is the same. If you sent me something already don't sweat it, I'll get it probably next month. Take care and I'll write as often as possible.

love, ****

HELLO 8-31-05

HELLO ALL. HOPE ALL IS WELL. IT STILL HOT HERE. I STILL HATE IT HERE. ITS STILL RUN LIKE A MONKEY FUCKING A FOOTBALL. BUT AS WITH ANY SHITHOLE, YOU FIND THE HUMOR IN ANYHTHING. FOR EXAMPLE, WE HAVE A BLIMP WITH A CAMERA FOR SECURITY TO MONITOR THE WIRE. WELL, LAST NIGHT THEY CAUGHT TWO IRAQIS FUCKING A DONKEY BEHIND A BUILDING. THESE ARE THE PEOPLE WE DEAL WITH. WELL, TOMMORROW IS THE DAY. I GO OUTSIDE THE WIRE FOR A RIDE ALONG WITH THE LOUISANNA NATIONAL GUARD. ONE OF TWO THING ARE GOING TO HAPPEN. I'M DEFINATLY GOING TO GET SHOT AT BUT AFTER THAT I'M EITHER GOING TO GET WET FROM THE TOP GUNNER PISSING HIMSELF-----I MAY TOO, OR I'M GOING TO GET WHIPLASH FROM THE ASSHOLES TAKING OFF TO RUN BACK HOME. WHEN WE TAKE OVER THINGS WILL CHANGE. WHEN WE GET SHOT AT WERE GOING TO LEVAL THE FUCKING PLACE. SENDS A MESSAGE, DONT FUCK WITH US. THESE GUARDSMEN HAVE BEEN LETTING HODGY DO WHAT THE FUCK HE WANTS FOR TOO LONG. OH A SIDE NOTE, I BOUGHT THAT MOVIE RED EYE YESTERDAY AND WATCHED IT---------YES PIRATED MOVIES ARE ALL THE RAGE HERE, DONT TELL THOSE FAGGOT IN HOLLYWOOD. YEAH THE MOVIE SUCKED.WELL, I GOTTA RUN.

LOVE ****

Iraq 8-28-05

Hello from Iraq!!!!!!!!!!!!! Well, I haven't been shot at yet but fear not. Starting very soon that shits going to change. We got a breif about our area. Its a fucking shithbole filled with cocksuckers we have to go interduce to allah. Thats right, up close and personel withy hodgy armed with AK's Don't worry though. Well have Iraqis finest with us and there great guys. They haul ass when the shooting starts and just blow up building instead of clearing them. Oh, I got a haircut today from a hodgy who likes little boys. The chow hall is a miule away and the PX is a mile and a half. They gave us today off so you know what that means. These stupid bastard lazy assed National Guard faggots havn't been doing shit over here so we have no idea what the fuck we're walking into. But fear not, I will be heavily armed. My happy ass is sitting in a armoured HMMVV with the 240 machine gun and I'll also have a M4 carbine, a 9mm that will most likly jam the piece of shit and a good old fasioned 12 gauge with bird shot. No, I'm not getting to do any bird hunting in this shithole, it to get dickheads attention if they;re driving around with there head up there asses. See, these guys love turning there Benzs into poorman cruise missles. So if the sound of brid shoot doesn't stop him, them I know I'm about to get fucked up if I can't unlease the 240 on him. Living conditions over here are pretty good. We have airt conditioned shitters, A/C in our rooms and the line for the phones and e-mails ins't real long. Shit, before I forget-------the army. They changed our address everything is the same but the zip code is

APO AE 09385.

Well, what do I need----------the fuck out of here but that shit wont happen. Just snacks room home, chips hot sauce, crackers cookies, beef jerky, magizines. Information is critical here. I just found out a hurricane is going to wipe out new Orleans--------what a shame. I gotta figure out how to send pictures of this place. Saddams lake palace is on our run route and believe me it sucks running around the damm thing. THere are alot of trees and cattails by the waddis or canals. Remember the scene in Star Wars when the robots crash into the desert-----thats Kuwait. This place reminds me of west texas out El Paso way. Oh, two dickheads from our company decided to go joy riding in someones HMMVV. THey are fucked but we all got a good laugh about it. Well, I wish I could talk more but I feel like shit and need to eat something. Eating here sucks because you don't want to during the day. Thank you for writing. believe me it does a ton of good to hear from back home. I continue to write as much as possible. I miss you all.

Love, ****